“Hold on dear,” Urudus said. “We’re stopping on Earth.”
          Falala giggled. “What on earth for?”
          Urudus smiled. “We’re experiencing transmission difficulties.”
          “I thought it was the best money could buy,” Falala chided.
          “It was,” Urudu s answered. He guided the ship into a pasture speckled with cows and wildflowers.
          “Won’t they recognize us?” Falala asked.
          “Not if we’re in costume.” Urudus spoke to the computer. Suddenly a cap, tennis shoes, jeans, and shirt for Urudus, and a long flower-printed cotton dress and sandals for Falala materialized before them. “Put these on,” he ordered. “Remember to speak in English so the natives will understand.”
          “Look,” Falala said, pointing. “There’s a house up on the hill. Maybe those beings can help.”
          “Remember to act like a human,” Urudus said. “We don’t want to be detained on our trip to Pluto. I only have a few light years off from work.”
          “How does a human act?” Falala asked.
          “Just act like those people in your fantasy books.”

Urudus and Falala walked toward the farmhouse, making notes of their surroundings. They delicately sniffed the air and felt the cool sun on their skin. They were used to more warmth, being from Mercury.
          The sign on the mail box read: Matilda and Henry Antell.
          Urudus pointed. “We’ve found an anthill.”
          “So?”
          “Well, I’ve read in magazines about anthills. Ants have segmented bodies, and several legs. They will appreciate our segmented bodies.”
          “I don’t have to keep my skin covered then?” Falala said.
          “We’d better, for the time being,” Urudus replied.

They walked up the porch steps. “Funny,” I don’t remember ants living in houses like this,” Urudus muttered.


 “Matilda!” Henry yelled. “Where are you?”
          “In here,” Matilda replied.
          “Where?”
          “In here!” Matilda called out.
          “WHERE?” Henry repeated.
          “In the kitchen.”
          “Why didn’t you say so?” Henry meandered into the kitchen. “What’s for lunch?”
          “Sandwiches,” she said.
          “What?”
          “SANDWICHES!” She placed a tuna fish sandwich with chips in front of her husband.
          There was a knock at the door.
          “Someone’s here,” Matilda said to Henry.
          “What?”
          “Oh, never mind.” Matilda went to answer the door.

Matilda opened the door a crack and peeked out. “Hello. May I help you?”
          “We need some help,” Falala said.
          “Oh, great. You came to help out. I was wondering when Elva was going to send her grandkids.” Matilda ushered the bewildered aliens inside. “Go on into the kitchen and grab a bite to eat.”
          Urudus and Falala followed Matilda. They looked at Henry eating his sandwich.
          “Henry.” Matilda paused to make sure her husband was listening. “HENRY! These are Elva’s grandkids. They came to help.”
          Urudus and Falala smiled.
          “Sit, sit,” Matilda ordered. “I’m sorry, what were your names?”
          Urudus cleared his throat. “I’m Urudus and that’s Falala.”
          “Those are strange names,” Matilda said. “I guess that’s the trend now, just writing down a bunch of letters and calling it a name.” Matilda offered the couple lunch. “Eat up. We’ve got lots to do before suppertime.”

Urudus and Falala took their eating cues from Henry. He shoved chips in his mouth and took a swig of root beer. Urudus and Falala did the same.
          “You have the same manners as my husband.” Matilda shook her head. “Well, come on, Falala. You’ll help me in the kitchen. Urudus, you help Henry in the garden.”
          Falala hesitated. She didn’t want to be separated from her husband.
          Urudus whispered, “Go. You’ll be okay. I’ll check with you later.”

Henry looked up from the table after a quick snooze. “I guess we’d better get outside for the weeding.” Urudus followed.
          “Stop gawking around,” Matilda told Falala. “Go to the pantry and get me some ladyfingers.”
          Falala tried not to faint. “What?” she asked.”
          “Ladyfingers.” Matilda pointed at the pantry. With great reluctance, Falala followed her aim.
          “Come on, son,” Henry said. “Don’t drag your feet. We’ve got work to do.”
          Urudus marched with high knees behind Henry.
          “We need to water the Burning Bush and Bleeding Heart,” Henry said.
          Urudus contemplated the merits of keeping a burning bush, while spraying water toward the area Henry indicated.

Back in the pantry, Falala searched for ladyfingers. She wasn’t sure that she wanted to find them.
          “Hurry up, child,” Matilda said. “I need those ladyfingers to get started on this dessert.”
          “I can’t find them,” Falala said. She poked and prodded among the shelves. Nothing resembled a lady’s fingers.
          Matilda bustled into the pantry, grabbed a package off the shelf and shooed Falala out the door. “Maybe you’ll be more help to Henry.”

Falala searched for Urudus and Henry. She saw Urudus looking confused at Henry’s wild gesturing.
          “Water the Burning Bush and Bleeding Heart,” said Henry. He pointed again.
          Falala looked for smoke and blood but found none. She understood Urudus’s confusion.
          “Hello, dear,” Henry said. “Why don’t you weed the Black-eyed Susans and Snapdragons?”
          Falala’s horror caught the attention of Urudus. He waved her to his side. “Just do what they say or we may be tortured alongside these plants they call flowers.”
          “I don’t want to,” Falala whimpered.
          “You have to,” Urudus urged. He continued spraying water in the general direction of Henry’s pointing, still not finding a Burning Bush or Bleeding Heart.

Falala searched for the Snapdragons and Black-eyed Susans. “Flowers are horrible things.”
          Matilda came out the back door. “What’s the matter dear?”
          “Uh…” Falala looked at her feet. “Nothing. I’m to weed the Black-eyed Susans and Snapdragons.” She dusted dirt from her dress.
          “When you’re finished, you’ll probably need to draw a bath to clean up,” Matilda suggested.
          “O…kay,” Falala said, while she searched for terrible snapping dragons and poor Susans with black eyes. She saw Urudus look up and waved him over.
          “We’ve got to get away from here,” Falala said in one breath. “I have to draw a bath next. You know I can’t draw!”
          “We can’t go until the part gets here,” Urudus said. “Father shipped it ZIPS (Zodiac InterPlanetary Service).”
          “Good. They guarantee delivery by midnight.” Falala looked into the flowerbed. She pulled up what she thought were weeds.

Henry watched from the backyard swing. “Matilda, come here.”
          “What?” she asked.
          “Look at those kids. That girl is pulling up my flowers, while that boy can’t tell a Bleeding Heart from a Daisy.”
          “Well, she couldn’t find the ladyfingers either.” Matilda sipped her lemonade. “I just don’t know what’s getting into kids today.”
          Henry nodded in agreement and went over to Urudus and Falala. “Why don’t you two take a break and head back to your grandparents’ house?”
          Relieved, Urudus and Falala waved “bye” and headed back to their ship.
          “Wait a minute!” Matilda called after them. “Take these Elephant Ears back to your grandparents.”
          “How are we going to carry those?” Urudus whispered.
          Matilda handed them a small plate covered with foil. The aliens headed to the pasture.

“Elephants are smaller than they appeared in my magazines,” Urudus noted.
          “I want to go home,” Falala cried.
          “Don’t worry, my dear. We’ll be out of here tomorrow.”

Urudus decided to look up the atrocious flowers on his computer. He started laughing. “Falala, come here.”
          “What?” she asked.
          “It appears all of those flowers were harmless. A Burning Bush isn’t on fire, a Snapdragon doesn’t bite, a Bleeding Heart doesn’t bleed, and there aren’t any Susans with black eyes stuck in the ground.”
          “I was worried that humans weren’t as nice as they appeared in my fantasy books.” Falala remained silent for a long moment. “What about the ladyfingers and Elephant Ears?”
          “Those are pastries,” Urudus said. He noticed the paper in Falala’s hand. “What have you got there?” he asked.
          “I drew my bath,” she replied.